Time or lack there of

I am so reminded of how little time we truly have in life today. Simply in the example of my day today. I know, how morbid, thinking of how short life is.

Sometimes I feel like we rush around all the time and truly accomplish nothing. At times I feel helpless to be able to slow any of it down.

Occasionally I take a look at what is going on and prioritize, trying to find something I can cut. The only thing that ever seems to be is spending time with/on family and friends. I am not willing to go there. I know it has already happened to a degree. I have friends that I miss. Many of them online friends because that is what has definitely decreased - online time. It makes me sad. You may say, "How does one miss an online friend?" I do. There is a spot in my heart that misses them and makes me miss being able to get together IRL even more. (Know you ARE missed.)

Being so busy makes it easier to lose track of what really matters. I know it adds to my stress levels, which triggers anger for me. I find myself in that place where I am actually spending time with my kids but it feels so worthless because I am so stressed and angry about everything. Instead of being able to just relax and spend the time together it gets wasted. I am making a conscious effort to really be in tune with my stress and anger and take it to the one I know can and will help me. Talk about LOTS of prayer!!! Someone told me the other day that her job is really demanding and it is reminding her to go to God with it. It shows her just how much she needs help. It was a good "refresher" perspective. Sometimes the stress in our lives is there because of us - because we need the reminder that we can't rely on ourselves alone. I have lived life "as an island". I don't want to be there again.

Today I am juggling a million things. It all started with a VERY late morning. I haven't been getting a lot of sleep and somehow I slept until 9 AM. Um, WOW!!! I was talking with Dave and saying that I need to remind myself not to get all stressed about how much HAS to be done today because I desperately needed that sleep and felt so much better for it. However, it is easy to look around me and get stressed out. That's when I really lose the value of those extra hours of sleep.

I know this is a bit of rambling but somewhere in there, I hope you can hear an echo of sense. It isn't how much time I have. It isn't about how much I get done. It's about what I do with the moments of time I have. Today my house may not be completely sparkling when company comes for dinner but my prayer is that I am at peace and my kids feel that company tonight doesn't mean they had a totally trashed day.